How to make an ins and outs list you'll actually stick to

Every late December the same format floods social feeds: two columns, "in" on one side, "out" on the other. Ins and outs lists started as a playful alternative to resolutions and have come back every new year since. Most of them are read once and forgotten by the second week of January. A few actually change how someone lives. The difference is almost entirely in how the pairs are written.

Write pairs, not wishes

The strongest entries come as pairs, where the in replaces the out. "In: reading on the train. Out: doomscrolling on the train." That's one habit swap with a built-in trigger, the train, and it tells you exactly what to do instead of just what to stop.

Compare that with "In: being healthier." It's a wish, not an entry. You can't tell on any given day whether you did it.

A good pair passes three tests:

1. Specific. You could take a photo of yourself doing it. "In: Sunday farmers market" beats "In: eating better."
2. Doable. It fits into a normal week without heroics. "In: a ten-minute walk after lunch" survives a busy month. "In: marathon training" might not.
3. A little funny. This is the part people skip, and it matters. "Out: pretending I'll use that gym bag in the car" is honest and slightly ridiculous, which makes it memorable. Humor is what makes the list shareable, and shared lists get followed.

Keep it short enough to remember

The format invites long lists. Resist. Somewhere between five and ten pairs is plenty, and fewer is often better. If you can't recite your list from memory in March, it's too long to be steering your choices.

A good mix is a couple of real habit changes, a couple of small pleasures you want more of, and one or two purely for fun. The fun ones aren't filler. They keep the whole thing light enough that you'll look at it again.

A list you can recite from memory in March is doing its job. A list you have to scroll back to find is a screenshot.

Share it on purpose

Posting the list is not just for the likes. A friend who has seen "Out: cancelling plans by text at 6pm" is a friend who will gently call it out when it happens. That light, social accountability is the whole engine of the format.

Send it to the two or three people most likely to notice, not just to a feed. Better still, trade lists with a friend and agree to swap updates later.

Revisit it mid-year

Pick a date around the middle of the year and put it in your calendar now. On that day, look at every pair and sort it into one of three piles:

• Stuck. It's just part of your life now. Leave it.
• Slipped. Still worth it. Rewrite it smaller.
• Wrong. You don't actually want it. Cross it out without guilt.

Then make a mid-year version. A new season is as good a reason as a new year, and a list rewritten in June with half a year of evidence is usually better than the one written in December.

If you want the list to look as good as it reads, Ins & Outs turns your entries into a designed card. Pick the classic two-column Ins & Outs template, or Green Flags / Red Flags, Hot Takes, The Roster, or 2026 Bingo, choose from five themes, and share a high-resolution card anywhere. Cards save to an on-device Library, so the mid-year rewrite starts from the original. It's free, needs no account and works fully offline. There's more on how the app builds a card in how Ins & Outs works.

Write fewer pairs, make them real, and let your friends hold you to the funny ones.